COLUMN: Spouse's
Turn
Dancer Santhi
talks about her life with music composer Bijibal
By Shevlin
Sebastian
In January, 2000,
Santhi Mohandas received awards for Bharat Natyam, Mohiniyattom and Kuchipudi
for a Youth Festival competition held at the Town Hall, Kochi. The man who presented them was music
composer Bijibal. “I did not notice him then,” she says.
Santhi’s brother,
Prashant, was learning to play the violin. When his teacher went abroad for an
extended period, he looked for a new guide. The family knew a musician by the
name of Sudheer Kumar. When they contacted him, Sudheer said that his cousin,
Bijibal, played and taught the violin well.
One day, Sudheer
went with Bijibal to the Mohandas home. When Santhi opened the door, Bijibal
said, “Aren't you Santhi?” She was surprised by the question. “Then Bijibal
said that he had met me earlier, at the prize distribution,” says Santhi. “It
was then that I recalled his face.”
Bijibal started
teaching Prashant at his house. Now and then he would call the Mohandas home to
ask Prashant to come. “Sometimes, I would attend the calls,” says Santhi. “On
the phone he sounded very friendly. He asked me about my studies and dance.
After a while, he told me that he believed in coincidences. Then, finally, he
said that he was interested in me. I said I had to ask my mother. I was only 19
then.”
After her
father's death on August 6, 1997, Santhi’s mother, Nalini, was very protective
of her. “When I told my mother she smiled, and said, ‘Let us ask the elders and
check out the horoscope,’” says Santhi. “That gave me an indication that my
mother was positive about Bijibal. Because of that, I began to develop feelings
for him.”
Thereafter,
everything went smoothly and the engagement took place on April 27, 2002. “We
never went out for dates before our marriage,” says Santhi. “He would call me
to go out with him, but my mother said no. So Bijibal would come home.”
However, on one
occasion, he got permission from Nalini to take Santhi to the Ernakulathappan
Shiva temple. “While there, I felt nervous and thought, ‘What if somebody saw
us?’” says Santhi. Just then, Bijibal’s aunt, Suma, stepped forward and said
hello to Bijibal. “Then Bijibal introduced me,” says Santhi. Suma said, “Oh,
yes, let things go ahead. Don’t worry, I will not tell anything to anybody.”
Santhi felt
embarrassed, and wanted to leave immediately. Anyway, they got onto a bus and
at the Janatha stop, Bijibal got down because his bike was parked there. As the
bus left, Santhi felt bad that she did not say a proper goodbye to Bijibal.
“Suddenly, there he was, on his bike, at the side of the bus, waving and
shouting goodbye to me,” says Santhi. “I felt red-faced as the other women
passengers stared at me.”
Eventually, the
couple tied the knot on June 21, 2002. And after ten years of marriage, Santhi
loves the fact that Bijibal is a calm and relaxed person. “If there is some
problem, and we need to solve it, he says that there is nothing to get worried
about,” says Santhi. “There are so many remedies. And I feel calm, as if
somebody has poured cold water over my hot head.”
Santhi also loves
the fact that Bijibal is such a good violin player. “When I was pregnant, I
used to tell him, ‘Vava wants to listen to some music’, and he would play for
me,” says Santhi. “He can play nice keerthanams and soulful film songs.”
Bijibal is also good at pencil drawing and reciting poems. “But now because of
his busy career, he has no time to do all these things,” says Santhi, with a
trace of regret in her voice.
But since Shanti
is a professional dancer, she understands the compulsions of her husband.
“Music is a passion for him,” she says. “Like him, I am also an artiste. I know
how much sincerity, dedication and hard work you need to put in so that you
become good at your art. So I give him full freedom.”
But sometimes,
Bijibal’s absence can have an effect. “The children [Devadutt, 8, and
three-year-old daughter, Daya] miss him,” says Santhi. “But more than that, I
tell him, ‘You are missing their growth. It is fun to see their games, change
of expressions, and joy of life.”
Meanwhile, asked
the secret of a successful marriage, Santhi says, “It should be an equal
relationship. One should give and receive respect. We should have trust in each
other. My husband meets young singers, while I work with other dancers. So,
faith is important. I know of quite a few friends whose marriages have broken
up because of a lack of trust.”
(The New Indian Express, Kochi and Thiruvananthapuram)
Hi to аll, the contents ргesent at this ωebѕіte аre really remarkable for peορle κnoωledgе, well, keep up the niсe woгκ fеllows.
ReplyDeleteHere is mу wеb-sitе payday loans online
Hеllo, the whole thing is going ѕounԁ here anԁ ofcouгse every оne іs
ReplyDeletesharіng dаta, thаt's in fact excellent, keep up writing.
My web blog: payday loans
Нellо, the whole thing is going sounԁ hеre
ReplyDeleteand ofcouгsе evегy оne
іѕ sharing data, that's in fact excellent, keep up writing.
Have a look at my website; payday loans
I'm impressed, I must say. Rarely do I encounter a blog that's bοth
ReplyDeleteеquаlly еducatіve and amusing, аnd let me tell
you, you've hit the nail on the head. The problem is something which not enough men and women are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy I found this in my hunt for something relating to this.
my blog Payday Loans
I loved as muсh as уou ωill reсeive сarriеԁ out гight herе.
ReplyDeleteΤhе sketch is attrасtive, your аuthоred matегial
stylish. nonetheless, you command gеt got аn shakinеsѕ over that you wiѕh bе delivering
thе fοlloωіng. unwell unquеstіonably come furtheг formeгlу again ѕince exactly the same neаrly а lοt оften inside сase yοu
shield this іncrease.
Stop by my ωebρage payday advance